The hits just keep on coming: It seems that Gina honored the agreement to wait until the new year to announce that she has quit TWiT. Now L&L can announce the continuation of the never-ending gushing exit of all talent at once. They still have Jarvis and Scott Wilkinson.
Watch as “Tech News Today” host and bumbling moron Mike Elgum struggles to close a Harry’s Shaving Products box on a recent episode of TWiT’s supposed flagship news show. (Harry’s is a TWiT advertiser and we here at #TotalDrama can’t imagine that they’d be happy that the Elgum seems to find it next to impossible to close a simple cardboard box.) In fact, it’s hard to watch as Elgum eventually gives up and pushes the box to the side.
We almost feel sorry for the inept loser. So let’s just wish him the best of luck in trying to tie his shoes. Hey, Mike: Don’t wander too far away from TWiT, OK? There’s some nasty traffic out there on Keller Street and you might just get yourself into trouble.
The baby was just a few hours old but not to soon to get insulted by the magnanimous Laporte. Was it an enemies offspring? No it was the beautiful innocent daughter of good friend Chris Pirillo.
Pirillo is not as close to the #soupguzzler as Kevin Spacey, but would it hurt to say a friendly “congratz” to the curly haired first-time dad. What’s that? You don’t believes this article, no one could be that heartless. Feast your eyes on the video below:
Was Leo caught off guard in a bad moment, did he immediately correct this blunder ? He didn’t stop trolling in the chatroom:
[14:35] <~Leo> I didn't even know she was pregnant!
[14:36] <~Leo> Who was the father?
Thanks to modern technology and friends of #TotalDrama within the highest levels of U.S. intelligence agencies, a new revelation has been exposed. Two facts that lived in conflict, until now, have finally been reconciled. How is the rapid weight-gain congruent with the fact that Laporte eats salad? The weight-gain—estimated at 2.42 pounds per day—is an amount well over the expected level, being that two of the five daily meals are listed as “salad.”
The first step in solving the riddle was photo-analysis via the latest high level CIA equipment. The process broke down the gargantuan forkfull of food to its essential elements. The results were so outlandish that #TotalDrama was compelled to garner another source to confirm the findings. A reporter was sent to find a former intern whose very job was ordering and fetching the “salad.” The question was posed, “What was in the salad?” This was done without giving the intern prior knowledge of the CIA findings. The result was a 100-percent match, and the ingredients are meticulously listed below:
Ribs (extra sauce)
Jiffy peanut butter
Hold the lettuce
Seven Island dressing
1 Big Mac with extra cheese
1/2 pie of Dominoes pizza
Ham coated in goat cheese
2 Slices of cheese cake
Green ham (shown in picture)
3 pieces of lasagna
Hold all vegetables
*Update* Details are now emerging that the Petaluma Market keeps yearling piglets out back to slaughter upon receipt of the Laporte salad order.
This video premiered early this morning. I did not have a chance to view it, in its entirety, but it seems to be what was heralded from the get-go. If you do not have time to sit through the entire two hours of uncut lies, this is a highlight reel
Brony Con 2015 should be better than last year, hit me up if you need tix.
The ever-insensitive and tone-deaf Leo Laporte has used Robin Williams’ sad passing as an excuse to tell his “MacBreak Weekly” audience that the Academy Award-winning actor’s death “was felt more keenly in the Bay Area.” Leo, please. Get a grip. Not everything needs to point back to you and your show.
A longtime TWiT watcher said he was shocked by Leo’s apparent lack of empathy. Upon learning of this transgression of basic human decency, the unnamed source said, “His sad devotion to steering content toward Search Engine Optimization (SEO) began with the hiring of Lgum and his attendant 3 million G+ bot fans, but has since sunk to a new low by attempting to squeeze a tragic death into a completely irrelevant show description. Not only is it a sad day for Mr. Williams’ family, and for America, but also for Leo’s integrity.”
Exposing The Dark Underbelly of TWiT, Leo Laporte, and Failed CEO Lisa Laporte