Leo Laporte calls Mark Cuban an “idiot” and “moronic”

Wannabe rich guy Leo Laporte, host of the nationally-syndicated radio show “The Tech Guy” called billionaire Mark Cuban, Dallas Maverick’s owner and star of “Shark Tank,” an “idiot” and “moronic” on Saturday’s show. Cuban did nothing to deserve this and Laporte should be held accountable for this rude defamation. What we find sad is that Cuban was an enthusiastic guest on “The Social Hour” with Amber MacArthur before Amber was fired by Leo’s wife with no warning.

Lame asshole reporter Mike Elgan way too excited to be riding on an airplane

Settle the fuck down, Gumbot. Jesus Christ.
Settle the fuck down, Gumbot. Jesus Christ.

Idiot TNT “news director” Mike Elgan is way too excited for an adult man to be riding on an airplane. Check out this piece of shit graphic he posted to Twitter trumpeting his trip to the Mobile World Congress in Barcelona. It’s almost as if he’s never been anywhere before.

Relax, Gummy. And be sure to not call the flight attendants “stewardesses.” They don’t like that very much.

Shannon Morse leaves TWiT for good

The amazing smile and other assets of the comely Shannon Morse have departed TWiT for good with her recent announcement on Twitter. That she has left “Before You Buy” comes as no surprise to TotalDrama readers. The code word  “off-site producer” are a sure tip-off that a former contributor has been shown the door by the jealous and bitter Lisa Kentzell.

We wish Snubs the best of luck and a hearty congratulations on escaping the horror show that is the Leo ‘n’ Lisa nightmare. You’ll do great, Shannon!


TotalDrama’s post on EffenDunn ranks second on Google

Scary weirdo, Jason C. Cleanthes
Jason C. Cleanthes

When searching for “Jason C. Cleanthes” on Google (the bozo’s last name eerily autocorrects on most people’s computers as “clenches”) it comes up for many as the No. 2 search for our previous post.

What a wonderful legacy you’re leaving for yourself, Jason. Congratulations!

Try it for yourself and see (use Incognito Mode for safety):


What happened to this site? It used to be good

Dearest God in Heaven Above,
Lord of Lords and Host of Hosts (but not Leo)

We beseecheth you to bringeth back ye olde TotalDrama. You know the one where there were constant #scoups and long-form videos?

td-crossWhy hath thou done did and forsaken us in our time of need? Thine “comedy posts” doth rubbeth some readers the wrong way. You know, those readers who don’t pay a dime to this site, who don’t understand that this is a volunteer effort and that it takes time and patience to tendeth to a site like this one. You know, those idiots of the most graceful and tender nature.

So fucketh you all to a violent yet peaceful death and may you live and reign in the kingdom of Drama for evermore.


Leo Laporte slams Myriam Joire

Leo Laporte has no class.
Leo Laporte has no class.

Leo Laporte, ever the consumate douche, slammed one of his newest contributors today during a live ad read for NatureBox during “This Week in Google.” In describing the snacks-by-mail service, Leo said “no trans fats.”

Myriam Joire
Myriam Joire

We here at TotalDrama operate by a live-and-let-live philosophy, and whatever the state of Myriam’s life path, we find it abhorrent that Leo would say that she is not welcome at TWiT. “No trans fats,” indeed. Horrible, just horrible to treat Myriam this way. Leo should be ashamed.

TotalDrama issues public apology

We can't get enough of the shit on TWiT.The editorial board at TotalDrama has returned from our Spring retreat near Zermatt where we all did a lot of soul searching. It has come to our attention that a recent post about a guest’s appearance was way out of bounds. TotalDrama apologizes for the lack of judgment exhibited by our writing staff.

It remains unclear at this point, however, exactly which post we’re apologizing for.

Breaking News: Leo Laporte in disarray over schedule changes

Leo Laporte is expressing surprise and concern over recent TWiT schedule changes mandated by Lisa Kentzell. During the pre-show to “Security Now” Steve Gibson informs Leo that he’s looking forward to the new time slot and Leo looks up  with no clue that Lisa, his wife, CEHo and cock-gobbler-in-chief, has made a change to his schedule, ostensibly so Leo can “eat.”

Leo, in response to Steve’s questioning about why they made changes said, “I don’t care about people complaining. AT ALL.”

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me with this shit

Rachel Metz has got to be putting us on, right?

How is this a serious show?
How is this a serious show?

UPDATE: It seems that quite a large a number of idiots read this blog who don’t grasp what the point of many of these posts are. So pay attention. And if you need to…read…this..slowly…

Rachel is wearing gigantic, white hipster glasses. Rachel wears these gigantic, white hipster glasses so we pay attention to her face. We look at her face and see those gigantic, white hipster glasses. We also see other things. These “other things” make our brains go, “What the fuck? You’ve got to be kidding me with this shit.” And boom! The blog post practically writes itself. If Rachel didn’t want us looking at her face, she wouldn’t wear those gigantic, white hipster glasses. Get it?