Day of Doom for Leo

Heart surgeons in Guatamala are predicting the worst for Leo. Lisa Kentzell is thrilled, however.
Heart surgeons in Guatemala are predicting the worst for Leo. Lisa Kentzell is thrilled, however.

This is pure speculation (not unlike every story on TNT), but a Guatemala-base consortium of heart surgeons is now prepared to announce, with 90-percent confidence, that Leo Laporte will succumb to a heart attack in 2016. Click here to follow the countdown clock. For security reasons, the clock can’t be posted on this site.

TWiT HQ unfortunately not destroyed in California earthquake

Sad news to report here from the newsroom at #TotalDrama: The recent California earthquake did not level the facilities at 140 Keller Street as once thought.

What we were hoping for, did not come to pass.
What we were hoping for, did not come to pass.

The Petaluma-based headquarters of the TWiT network was not destroyed as many had hoped.

Better luck next time tectonic plates—we’re counting on you to do your shakiest shaking in the coming months.

Using Gazelle against TWiT

gazelleSo this past weekend, I decided to take Mike Elgum’s advice and “lock-in” a potential sale of my iPhone on Gazelle. I know there are other ways and other sites that will give me more money for my “used gadget,” but I’ve honestly been happy with the service I’ve received from Gazelle through the years.

Here’s where it gets fun for #TotalDrama fans: In the drop-down menu where it asks where I heard about the service, I chose the “5by5” network. Not TWiT. So I have—if I eventually do sell my iPhone to Gazelle—actively with clear mind and heart, chosen to screw Leo and the gang out of the referral code credit.

I feel so good.

This show is killing me

I might need to take a long vacation because “Tech News Today” is seriously grinding my brain into dust with its complete and total refusal to be a professional-looking show.

The only evidence that needs to be presented in the trial of The People v. Elgum:

Yes, I would be looking down ashamed if I were orange and purple as well.
Yes, I would be looking down ashamed if I were orange and purple as well.

The verdict is in: GUILTY of gross negligence to the art and science of professional broadcasting on all counts.

TNT Stitcher Ratings Collapse

Elgum Does it Again
Elgum Does it Again, click image to see scope of loss.

The heralded gains in Stitcher ratings have proven short-lived. “Tech News Today” has been spewing countless plugs for people to double subscribe via the Breaking News Maven: Mike Elgum. However, the pitiful begging seems to have resulted in  the exact opposite effect. The intended spike has turned into a never-before-seen drop as the

Will a triangle desk help ratings?
Will a triangle desk help ratings?

ratings on Stitcher have plummeted to record lows. Not to worry TNT fans, they can always redo the desk or change Gum’s face from orange to lavender.

Coffee Shop Squatters©

Having almost nothing to do with TotalDrama, except perhaps a homage to our favourite squatter.

Mike, there’s always an office for you, anywhere, free (for you) and with helpful staff.  Fly little bird, please. Somewhere else please, pretty please.

Bv1SlTuCIAAn-aN

MIke’s favourite sort of place, free space and free coffee.

@MikeElgan:  How to identify a really nice town: stores with the honor system.

New Feature: DVR

#TotalDrama is proud to announce our latest feature: DVR functionality for the TWiT live stream. Select DVR option from the top menu and you can go over the past couple of days of the live stream, see thumbnail previews of the video, watch it, and download it in convenient 30 minute segments.

Never again miss that super funny moment that you just saw. Uploading clips to YouTube has never been so easy.

War Against Us

Telling #Truth is not popular in all quarters. To see just to which length some sick individual will go, you don’t have to look much further than Robert Ballecer’s twitter account. Our previous article documents his lies and intimidation attempts where he mistakenly thinks that photoshopping my face out of a picture (although very creepy) would prevent us from exposing his perverted ways.

Others tried more direct approach. This is an email that has been sent to our hosting provider in an apparent attempt to take #TotalDrama down:

I stumbled upon this post when looking up a colleague: 
Get yourself together, girl
I clicked around the website and noticed some posts were harassing:
Lisa wears a skirt for one reason only
Others are defaming.
Lights Curiously Out on One Particular Dropcam
Petaluma is not the picturesque paradise that Laporte purports
The WHOIS shows the site hosted on a Digital Ocean server at 178.62.62.239. Is this allowed? Concerned, Susan Peterson

Good thing our hosting provider values free speech more than an attempted by a random internet troll to shut us down.

More Allegations by Roberto 3X

The father of hate’s original attempt to stir the community did not rile them to his crusade against the free speech advocates of TotalDrama.org

So he made up a story that [name redacted] was ddosed even though [name redacted] was simultaneously in six irc rooms and on twitter. Failed again.

In his latest attempt, he is actually going so far as to accuse total drama of interfering with suicide prevention. Are accusations of murder far behind?

He then did another veiled doxing threat against a charter member of td.o. (It is this websites policy not to post doxings so we will not post it, seems nothing is sacred to Padre, #JarvisLogic)
Whats next, expose that richardya is a Brony? Not gonna happen, that closeted passion of his, is well covered under multiple layers of VPN and TOR.

Exposing The Dark Underbelly of TWiT, Leo Laporte, and Failed CEO Lisa Laporte