STOP THE WORLD! There’s a black woman on “This Week in Google” right now. Tweet her @lynneluvah Leo Laporte’s racist video:
Just to refresh your memory, this is where Leo Laporte says the word “niggras” right in front of Lamarr Wilson. He is a shameful racist.
Megan Morrone has apparently joined the TNT “anchor desk” and boy is she already weighing the show down with her monotoned delivery and dead eyes.
In an attempt to liven up the failing show, she put a banana on her head. No amount of fake smiles and forced laughter could distract viewers from the fact that the show just plain sucks.
How about this for a thought? Instead of constantly tweaking the format, why doesn’t TWiT realize that the ONLY thing that has remained the same is Mike Elgan? Is it really that hard to figure out what the problem is?
The editorial board at TotalDrama is relieved and grateful to announce that an angel investor has swooped in and has rescued us in our desperate time of need. If you recall, we were mere days away from getting shut down.
But it seems that our mission here has caught the attention of an anonymous savior and we have been saved. We aren’t allowed to divulge any details of who provided us with the reprieve from the hangman’s noose, but trust us when we tell you that our supporters are legion and we are stronger and more capable than ever. There are some powerful people out there and we have a few of them in our corner fighting for #Truth.
TotalDrama lives! This also means that the IRC is alive and kickin’ as well.
TotalDrama is proud to present our first long-form user submission from the “Feedback & Tips” button on the right side of this website. We’re not sure if they want credit or not, so we erred on the side of discretion.
If the person responsible for this exclusive interview would indeed like credit we’d be happy to add it!
Tell me a little about yourself…
Well hi first of all hi and thanks for that’s a good question thanks for having me M M Mi Mike, thanks for inviting me. I’m I’m um I’m Mike and my name, my name full name is Mike. I’m my in my official title name Mike is Head of Mike Media TWiT inc Mike Media. I married well I did I got I am married to my beauti- my beautiful her name she’s actually my business partner because what I always say and I think it’s really important this is, this, this um what we try to do is start from a fresh page, I think that’s the best the best the, fresh page is how you start each day because when you’re in the fast pace moving of tech world of technology, it’s important to surround yourself with the right technology and in the future I this is I think what exactly we are going to feel and believe much more of them.
What do you do for TWIT?
I’m actually I’m actually I’m actually, a a actually it’s not really about TWiT so much as being the best of way to get what is an increasingly popular form of tech newstertaintment but into out there, and so when Leo asked me I was thrilled, thrilled as you can imagine and I think it’s important to give Leo credit, this is a guy who saw the saw the saw the, who then put his, well excuse my language but he put his mouth right where the future was, as we all try to do in a way but I think leo succeeded, and if there’s really only one way of many ways to answer your question, many ways I think.
What is the next big thing in technology?
I’m asked this question all the time. And I think that if you ask it in that way you are really missing what is the future because as we always say if you don’t look at the past and look future, future is the way to go but you got from there to here, so my my my wife and I were walking on the beach last week and I saw a shell a a shell, and she shed sea shed shell the shell short of shed to me that if you hold a shell to your ear you can hear the ocean and I think that’s a perfect metaphor for the way the future unfolds here at TWIT, and TNT is the perfect place to not only watch the future happen, but to actually make the future – because as the said always said always say, the best way to invent the future is to invent it.
Where do you see yourself in five years time?
Ha. Sorry for laughing so much I er I because I laughed because you’d have to ask Leo but really it isn’t about Leo it’s bigger than me, bigger than Apple and I think Apple is an interesting case because people are missing the big picture, which is that if you start off by only looking at the mass the mass the massive success of Apple, you start to think that maybe the critics were wrong, but what I think is that we have to look at what happened to the slave market and it was a market even though with the computers not invented, slave owners didn’t have the ability to properly monitor their slaves but with modern tablet devices device, you can manage inventory much more success and Apple really needs to think about working with Microsoft because the partnership with IBM represents everything that’s wrong with the, with the, with the inventory market. You have to remember that Google is not a search company, it’s not an advertising company, it’s actually aimed at children, and if you look you look closely, very closely, you will see the colours which are colours in painting sets for children. When you download a google app.
Do you have any messages for the TWIT audience?
Whaddup
Mike, thanks so…
(interrupting) And the real message is, don’t stop buy believe buy go to buy, but if you believe in what you buy, then consumer market driven.
Mike, thank you.
According to a submission using the “Feedback & Tips” button on the right side of this website, Premiere Networks is currently running a soft survey on the front page of their bizarre website “I Heart Radio” where you can select from all kinds of different musical genres and create your own “radio station.” We here at TotalDrama suggest selecting everything BUT News & Talk. This will tell the head honchos over at Premiere Networks that we don’t care about Leo’s stupid “Theeeeeee Tech Guy” program. And who knows, maybe it will eventually get cancelled.
Give it a try, it’ll be fun to try and freeze Leo out of yet another popularity contest.
“All the news without the ads”
Leo does a fine translation of the entire “Security Now” show:
<~Leo> translation: it’s faster
Is Sarah Lane married?
New corporate credit card displays my name as “Sarah Lane Yes”. Whatever, I’m gonna run with it. Please update your records. Signed, Ms. Yes
— Sarah Lane (@sarahlane) February 17, 2015
#Soup throws insults around freely, as we all know, but the Editorial Board here at Total Drama was entirely surprised how effectively Leo Laporte was able to fit in some huge slams during the “This Week in Tech: 497” pre-show and show intro this past Sunday.
A crime wave of epic proportions is sweeping the tech-reporting landscape: Crap caps and horror hats are popping up all over TWiT’s broadcasting schedule; led most recently by former kilt-wearing Mac-hater Patrick Norton as seen above on “This Week in Tech” last Sunday. Even if Norton is just trying to channel the spirit of Samuel L. Jackson, it’s just not working. Perhaps he’s taken his cue from the wretched headgear of superslut Christina Warren?
Whatever the case, let’s hope that TWiT guests leave the fashion to New York and Milan and that they stop trying to push the envelope with their ugly noggin shields. Didn’t their mothers tell them that good manners dictate that when indoors you take off your hat?
UPDATE: Due to the eagle-eye of a commenter, it has come to the attention of the editorial board at TotalDrama that Patrick’s hat is actually a veiled “fuck you” to Leo. Bravo, Norton. Bravo.
Leo Laporte got pwned today by one of the heroes of the movement as he was attempting to describe a new service that allows tweeting from a web browser’s menu bar. He has since deleted the “test tweets” from the Futz.me service. But not before a TotalDrama spy was able to take a screengrab:
Later, #Soup got told off by Futz.me after Leo tweeted his displeasure with the service:
@leolaporte Leo use your brain here. It's a free innocent thing & U have a platform which means responsibility. Smart men love smart things.
— Futz me (@futzme) February 12, 2015
And now, here’s the video chronicling the entire affair that was made by an anonymous national treasure and sent to TotalDrama under cover of darkness (click on the center of the box to play):
Uh oh — looks like @leolaporte has had his Twitter account hacked by the TotalDrama folks
— Mathew Ingram (@mathewi) February 11, 2015
No, Mathew. Leo was not hacked. He put it out publicly that he wanted people to test Futz. So somebody did.
And finally, here’s the reaction from the shut-ins in the TWiT chatroom (please use the scroll bar on the right of the text to see more):
<downclimb> Now Leo's last tweet says "Go to (vaynerchuk)a.eu". I think somebody's gotten access to his account <bleak> what got hacked!? *** ScooterX sets mode +b *!*@twitirc-56a15079.resnet.colorado.edu *** ScooterX kicked downclimb (Look What You Did!) <@ScooterX> Leo; your Twiiter account is compromised! <Web4902> We can hear you guys <arjavrawal> raygun01: what's on today's arena? <darkroom08> read lips time <gardner> that image should be the billboard <gardner> yes we can ginatrapani <ReverbMike> we can hear ya * JoelH refuses to read Leo's lips durring secret time <sxpert> Leo: your twitter account appears hacked <menace> quick, mute leo <cr1> Leo was saying vacuum. must be an appliance-related crisis. <Web0328> still hearing <donaldkelly_mbp> Yep, Leo needs to get on Twitter, someone got in via API. <bleak> lol <Uosdwis> Oopsie <bleak> this is classic <donaldkelly_mbp> oooops lol <bleak> go disable futz's access leo <HighTech> Leo has joined the ranks of the recently hacked? <Web4902> Nice tweets, Leo! <Web9412> Leo your twitter account was hacked <FlyerScott> Agreed, I think Leos twitter got hacked? <gardner> oopsy <arjavrawal> Leo's twitter's been hacked <@Houdini7> Leo knows. he's fixing it now. <Specs> Wow. Huge problem. <bleak> raygun01 - leo - Just go disable futz's access leo berX has quit (Ping timeout: 182 seconds) <Phlake> Oh no! <+raygun01> he did bleak <darkroom08> that will have to be Google Translates next update, read lips <Web4902> Total drama is shutting down? <bleak> cool <CaptainBronco> Leo just got FUTZ'd <menace> twitter at the end of the day is so so goofy <HighTech> On FOX news: Leo Laportes' Twitter has been hacked? *** ScooterX sets mode -b *!*@twitirc-56a15079.resnet.colorado.edu <Web4902> Do you still recommend FUTZ, Leo? <HighTech> -Am I muted? <Web6184> Looks like Leo's twitter account has been hacked. <Web4902> You might want to make an addendum in the show, Leo <bleak> who are these people who hate twit but watch twit.... its just so weird <@ScooterX> downclimb: the content you shared here was not welcome and thats what caused the ban <FlyerScott> Sorry that happened Leo, glad you got it cleaned up <Web4883> what is futz? <DLR> do people know what "futz" means? <Kisnet> no security <Wumpermill> Title: 'Futz'd' <Kisnet> ouch <menace> but ya gotta ban leo <arjavrawal> Title: Leo Gets Futzed <Ither> Title: "I hate those green bubbles" <HighTech> Wumpermill Hey- have I been muted? <Web4902> I would recommend people not use it <menace> then urban after the dust settles <bleak> because its a bad idea <its_me> Web4883: in secure <Wumpermill> HighTech: i c u <menace> unban <bleak> lol <Chickenhead21> SHOW TITLE: What the Futz is Going On <Virgil> Leo: show title? Tiny Blue Bubbles <HighTech> Wumpermill Thx! :) <toedsloth> quite a circus you started there <BigJinge> My Twitter notifications from Leo made it light up like a Christmas tree. <Ither> Title: "I hate those green bubbles" <bleak> but you'll publicise these idiots <dagimar> Leo Title: "Spare us the Newlyweds" <Web5924> Futz the green bubbles <hopetindall> go Futz yourself <Web4902> Wow, that was some adventure for the day haha <FredFlintstone> Futz'd by Green Bubbles <bleak> didnt he say "we're googley it google" <dagimar> Leo Title: "A Lot to Expect of Normals" <FreeWiFi> Show Title: Green Bubbles <Wumpermill> 'Oh I/O, I/O!' <dagimar> Doug <bleak> didnt he say "we're googley at google" <hopetindall> "Futz free" <Chickenhead21> SHOW TITLE: Leo, the Blue Bubble Boy <Web4902> Doug hacked leo's twitter!! <dagimar> Leo Title: "Play the Trapanis" <Wumpermill> 'Its a Small Instrument' <bleak> dat green bub <@ScooterX> Leo: You should delete the tweets that are still there <arjavrawal> Futz Dose Green Bubbles <jay> we're googley at google <dagimar> Leo Title: "spare us the Newlyweds" <HighTech> Hmmm. I've never been to Twitter... <donaldkelly_mbp> @ScooterX - they all look to be gone on my end <Web4001> If your iphone has a case of the blues you need to get out imore <BigJinge> No, YOU'RE awesome! :) <@ScooterX> donaldkelly_mbp; ah, now they are <FredFlintstone> just happy to see Gina once in awhile <arjavrawal> ScooterX: they're all gone <bleak> leo should probably delete the futz/me tweet as well sine its a massive security flaw <@OzNed> and now we all learned something ;) <HighTech> So- you've been Futzed? <Ither> Title: "I hate them green bubbles" <werner> I thought this is a clean show, futz in Swiss German slang means c*, i.e. (vaynerchuk)!!! <@ScooterX> downclimb: it was a quick response to the content you shared. <TerryK> Thanks ginatrapnai and JeffJarvis_. Outstanding show today. <bleak> i screenshot it cause it was pretty funny <@ScooterX> werner: family friendly please <SCADA_Ron> Great Show Jina Jeff Jason and Leo <bleak> thats awesome btw <arjavrawal> bleak: it was hilarious wasn't in? <arjavrawal> *it <marsworm_> off to see the wizard cya <jay> go pats <Web5910> Futz isn't the problem, it's the giving out of the secret name <bleak> arjavrawal: would have been funnier if they didnt promo a site written by pathetic losers <Ither> Title: "I hate them green bubbles" <Chickenhead21> His mom better make him a bowl of soup <downclimb> That's okay, ScooterX. Even if it does break my streak of 8ish years in the TWiT IRC without a kick or ban. <arjavrawal> bleak: They're just bitter and I don't blame them <Web4001> I got a bad case of the iphone blues <bleak> Web5910: the likelihood of someone overseeing a username that is written in plaintext is MASSIVE. its a bad idea <arjavrawal> Bitter with the mods for kicking them <bleak> arjavrawal: whatever. I like the mods, even though I have the prize for most bans in a year <bleak> they need to grow a pair
Four Toilets will be exiting stealth mode and bidding on the web design for the new TWiT website.
We believe that our ability to utilize open-source supply-chains and architect viral platforms will allow TWIT to optimize cross-media convergence.
Our competitive pricing will efficiently strategize competitive total linkage along with undercutting any other idiots.
We are looking for a whiteboard and some cool office chairs. Maybe a conference table. Any contributions will receive a cool plaque and mention in the page source of the new website.
Job listings will be found on all the usual websites. We understand there’s an app for that.
Currently looking to fill the following:
Forward Marketing Director
Product Quality Facilitator
Internal Factors Liason
Soup Chef (Internal)
While our bespoke site is being crafted here is our placeholder.
