Jeff Jarvis is an old man who has worn out his welcome with the former fans of “This Week in Google.” He was once an engaging, jovial personality. But recently has been infected with the sadness and negativity of the entire TWiT operation. He mostly just whines and yells out grumpy opinions that nobody really wants to hear anymore.
Monthly Archives: October 2014
Who We Is
Just because I retired, doesn’t mean I can’t tell the world…
who we are!
Happy #totaldrama day everyone!!!
It is customary to get kicked from TWiTlive IRC at least once on October 23rd in observance of this day. And thank you to the lovely and talented Sarah Lane for giving us our daily tech news on this holy of holy days.
Amen and may god bless you all.
The TWiT livestream is not that much different than this
With help from #TotalDrama chatroom members Fred and LKalif:
Leo Laporte:
I’m going to Austin. I need a sandwich. A turkey sandwich. I was just in London. Lisa and I are going to Austin. We were just in London. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. And Lisa and I are going to Austin by plane and I talked to Steve Martin on my Tech Guy show that put me two degrees from Kevin Bacon. I am going to Austin. I am going to Austin. Look at me, I am going to Austin. Steve Jobs talked to me once. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. Lisa and I are going to Austin. We were just in London. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. And Lisa and I are going to Austin by plane and I talked to Steve Martin on my Tech Guy show that put me two degrees from Kevin Bacon. I am going to Austin. I am going to Austin. Look at me, I am going to Austin. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. Lisa and I are going to Austin. We were just in London. I’m going to Austin. I am friends with Kevin Spacey. I was just in London. The Brickhouse has cost me millions. TNT is a hard show. I got up at 4 a.m. And Lisa and I are going to Austin by plane and I talked to Steve Martin on my Tech Guy show that put me two degrees from Kevin Bacon. I am going to Austin. I am going to Austin. Look at me, I am going to Austin. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. Lisa and I are going to Austin. We were just in London. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. And Lisa and I are going to Austin by plane and I talked to Steve Martin on my Tech Guy show that put me two degrees from Kevin Bacon. I am going to Austin. Thanks to Tonya for the help on TNT. I am going to Austin. Look at me, I am going to Austin. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. Lisa and I are going to Austin. We were just in London. I’m going to Austin. I was just in London. And Lisa and I are going to Austin by plane and I talked to Steve Martin on my Tech Guy show that put me two degrees from Kevin Bacon. I am going to Austin. I am going to Austin. Look at me, I am going to Austin. I need a turkey sandwich I won’t be able to eat on the plane. I need a sandwich or soup.
Leo admits that nobody is watching
Leo Laporte admits that his failing tech network doesn’t get ratings. Turn off the cameras, turn off the lights and throw your workers out.
Petaluma Psycho
I have been writing for this site since mid-October 2014 and I seem to have gained a reputation as the Pro-Leo guy or TWiT apologist. This is simply not true and I think this article will support my stance. Ya’ll seem to think #soupguzzler is some sort of “liar.” Well, fine, he does lie a bit to fans about some stuff. Yea, I’d Fund That, Game of Geeks, twelve meet ups a year world-wide, in just eight months Mikes turned into a real pro, great friends with Kevin Spacey, not letting advertisers dictate content, a fresh Breaking News Division, cancelling shows, offering Amber a goodbye episode, money invested in TWiT, flying people in for the NYE show, sending Elgum to Thailand to cover stories and a few other minor untruths but big deal.
However, I think the way he treats people is a little cold. In this video we see an oral reunion with Ray Maxwell. A former TWiT host and friend.
- The poor guy has to call in to talk to Leo
- Leo couldn’t call the guy when he was diagnosed with cancer?
- He will hook him up with the Know-How show, sure
- “I just miss you so much”
- He doesn’t even save the guys contact info
- They are going to visit him in Vancouver
I couldn’t place what #soup’s condition was until I remembered a line from American Psycho. A great novel/movie everyone should watch about Patrick Bateman, a self-centered psychopath who basically hates everyone. Here are some quotes.
Do they ring any bells?
Patrick Bateman: I have all the characteristics of a human being: blood, flesh, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust
Steve Jobs Only Stole a Couple Thousand From Woz
It is a shame how the greedy often rip off the innocent. Lost amongst the Soup Maestro’s blathering about how his shows subsidize all the other shows is one small detail. He has co-stars on his shows. In some cases those co-hosts are the shows. Is there anyone who thinks Laporte’s contribution of eating lunch is equivalent to Steve Gibson’s contribution of delivering complex sermons on the intricacies of the internet? Which Gibson, in all likelihood, spends hours and hours preparing for.
Gee, I wonder what the profit split is, fifty fifty seems likely. Well not really. They both need offices, they both need microphones, editing can’t be more than 20 minutes work, a few C notes for hosting etc. Hmm, I guess they have a spreadsheet for those expenses. That show is a massive success and grew 28% just this past year, surely Steve got a 28% raise as well. If Leo is able to subsidize all the other shows with his share of his four shows, Gibson must be living on easy street. Looks like being smart isn’t as lucrative a trait as being conniving.
“Trust no one” may in fact have its own double entendre, ay Steve?
Sarah Lane’s existence on Wikipedia now completely erased
Sarah Lane, who had her Wikipedia page challenged a few weeks ago, has now apparently been completely erased from the encyclopedia of the Internet. The link now leads to an “American ballet dancer” instead of being populated with information about the beloved California-based tech goddess and foil for Leo Laporte’s licentious motives. We mourn for the loss of the real Sarah Lane’s identity. Here’s the impostor’s page on Wikipedia. And please, whatever you do, DO NOT edit this other woman’s page to exact vengeance.
Jason Howell tells the truth about TNT
All-around good guy Jason Howell has taken the opportunity with Mike Elgum being out of the studio to finally tell the TWiT audience the truth. Howell let fly a four-letter word during a recent taping of “Tech News Today” as Leo Laporte filled in for the globe-trotting Mike Elgum that perfectly describes the morass through which Howell wades every single day. Hats off to you, Jason! You’re one of the good ones.
Leo Laporte shares why he’s a fathead
One-time interesting person Leo Laporte shares his secret reason for being a fathead: He thinks it hides the fact that his face is sliding off.
Watch as “iPad Today” co-host Sarah Lane doesn’t move a muscle as Laporte expounds on his pounds.
Leo, Shannon and Sarah
Get your mind out of the gutter Monsieur Laporte, this is not some sick fantasy of yours. What follows here is a detailed introspective of how the latest Sarah incident is directly related to the latest Shannon incident. In this story reported by Helloworld, we saw Leo say the following to Sarah while leering at an adorable and fashionable short skirt she wore, “You can’t see anything except a dark triangle.” This was an obvious allusion to the pubic tuft of hair often found above a woman’s genitalia. (Asked for comment, Sarah-Lane-expert Richard Yes had this to say, “anyone who watches Sarah do a Harry’s Razor ad while focusing on her telling smile is keenly aware that there is no such triangle.) A good point but not the angle we are working on here.
The question remains, is this a form of sexual harassment? Judging by the reaction of Miss Lane it appears it was not. She smiled, she chuckled, she retorted with another joke. However the behavior of Mr. Laporte needs to be examined in its entirety on an institutional level. Firstly, it should be noted that this behavior, if not from a boss, would not be illegal. Often grownups, like my mom and dad, make adult jokes with each other, especially friends. But then why is this behavior inappropriate? Laporte could just say he was acting as a good friend in a joking manner. To answer this question we need to examine another joke by a TWiT employee.
When Shannon responded to a joke on Twitter regarding Lisa, the joke resulted in her *termination. Boom, Lisa didn’t like the joke, so Shannon was shown the door. Well, what if Sarah didn’t like what Leo said, what if it made her uncomfortable? Too bad princess. Jokes are acceptable only when his majesty the boss Leo or his girlfriend/CEO say it’s acceptable! This my fine feathered friends is why it’s sexual harassment, allegedly. Remember when Sarah returned from her trip and found herself the victim of a prurient shoulder rub by Laporte, what if Jason walked into CEO’s office and began to rub her shoulders? The lawmakers put sexual harassment laws on the books for this very reason. Without these edicts, the boss says what he wants and the employee acquiesces. If you think this is a two way street you will find yourself in a serious head-on collision.
The actual time window to file a sexual harassment claim will vary by state. Sarah may want to file within the next 180 days to see if she has a claim and could own TWiT by the end of November. Who knows? Tom Merritt may find himself back from whence he came.
Read more: http://employment-law.freeadvice.com/employment-law/sexual_harassment/time_limitations.htm#ixzz3Gmehr82e
Under Creative Commons License: Attribution
*It should be noted that the exposé by #TotalDrama resulted in a temporary stay of the Shannon termination.
