Mike Elgum continues his march to irrelevancy by still not bothering to move his lips consistent with the skills of a real broadcaster. In this clip from a recent “Tech News Today” show, watch the bumbler-in-chief butcher a simple location shout-out. There’ll be no global reporting for you, Mr. Elgum…not with such a childish grasp of geography or an even more tenuous grasp on the difference between tiny household pets and English towns.
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Mike Elgum lies about his favorite music
What a shame that Mike Elgum can’t seem to tell the truth about what kind of music he enjoys. On a recent episode of “Before You Buy” he busts out with a ridiculous answer that even Leo Laporte doesn’t buy. What a joke this “news director” has turned out to be. Why should we believe anything he has to say if he can’t even bring himself to be honest about his personal tastes?
Elgum can’t close a simple box
Watch as “Tech News Today” host and bumbling moron Mike Elgum struggles to close a Harry’s Shaving Products box on a recent episode of TWiT’s supposed flagship news show. (Harry’s is a TWiT advertiser and we here at #TotalDrama can’t imagine that they’d be happy that the Elgum seems to find it next to impossible to close a simple cardboard box.) In fact, it’s hard to watch as Elgum eventually gives up and pushes the box to the side.
We almost feel sorry for the inept loser. So let’s just wish him the best of luck in trying to tie his shoes. Hey, Mike: Don’t wander too far away from TWiT, OK? There’s some nasty traffic out there on Keller Street and you might just get yourself into trouble.
Leo Laporte states outrageous cost for ‘iPadToday’
Plump idiot Leo Laporte claims “iPadToday” has cost him $400,000 and that it’s all just a big waste of money as co-host Sarah Lane sits by practically speechless in this clip from September 22, 2014.
Mike Elgum defends his purple shirt
In this short but sweet video clip, brain-dead automaton Mike Elgum answers a chatroom questioner who dares to liken his trademark purple shirt to a less manly color. Everybody who had eyes and has seen at least two TNT shows knows that Elgum likes to wear purple shirts. He rarely deviates from this misguided uniform because at a fundamental level he’s just kind of a dumb guy. He’s the sort of person who sells out his son’s private wedding during an ad read for a website development company, after all.
If anything, we’d be disappointed if he didn’t show up to work wearing anything else but a hand-me-down from a 1992 Express for Men store’s bargain bin. Here’s to you and your crappy taste, Elgum!
Justin Robert Young: Hero to the World
Watch and learn from this clip by one of the greatest heroes of the modern era, Justin Robert Young:
Elgum can’t tell when or where in the space-time continuum he is
Insane goofball and Internet-meme wannabe Mike Elgum can’t decide if it’s tonight or today. Maybe it’s both? Maybe it’s neither? Whatever the case, we know the truth: He’s a dumb guy.
The goons have not gotten me
Just a quick note to let you know that Leo’s goons have not gotten me—I’m just taking a little vacation. I should be back around Oct. 5.
Keep up the fight, #TotalDrama!
Amber MacArthur blindsided after 8 years with TWiT about getting cancelled
It turns out that Amber MacArthur was blindsided about the cancellation of her long-running show, “The Social Hour” that she co-hosted with Sarah Lane. Upon hearing the news from a concerned fan, Amber replied to a tweet from Three Ton Tonya (that’s one more ton than Two Ton Tonya) about her show getting cancelled. Apparently Amber was unaware of her show being dropped from the TWiT lineup.
It’s such a shame that CEHo Lisa Kuntzell doesn’t have enough class to tell Amber privately before blasting out the blog post that announced the programming changes. If the gold-digging girlfriend of Leo Laporte weren’t too busy planning their ritzy London vacay, she might have had the decency to properly inform loyal contributors that they’ve been let go.
@ThreeTonTonya sorry, was just surprised this AM after 8 years with them
— amber mac (@ambermac) September 25, 2014
Massive changes hit TWiT schedule
Massive changes have hit the TWiT schedule—and they have hit hard. Lisa’s memo was posted here, but it’s repeated below just in case the a-holes at TWiT HQ take it down. (We are very thorough here at #TotalDrama.) Many avid TWiT hate-watchers are scratching their heads in absolute disbelief that Two Ton Tonya’s bullshit marketing show “Marketing Mavericks” didn’t get the ax. As a result, Sarah Lane is hanging by a thread and Chad Johnson should be looking for other work. The flame-headed freak has had his network presence slashed to the bone.
Here’s Lisa’s memo in all its “You’re Fired” glory:
As we head into October, there will be a few changes on TWiT.
Starting next week, OMGcraft will be leaving our network. Chad “OMGchad” Johnson will continue his show independently, and new episodes will be posted on the OMGcraft YouTube channel.
We are also retiring The Social Hour. Originally called net@night, it is one of our longest-running netcasts, starting when “social media” was still in its infancy. As the landscape has matured and trends have shifted towards apps, we feel that social media coverage is now a part of almost every show on our network.
For similar reasons, redditUP will also be going on hiatus. It may return in a revamped form at some point.
Chad will continue to co-host The Giz Wiz, and you’ll still see him at the Tricaster throughout the week. Sarah Lane will continue to host Tech News 2Night and iFive for the iPhone, in addition to co-hosting iPad Today. You can keep up with Amber MacArthur’s latest projects by following @ambermac on Twitter.
Marketing Mavericks will be moving to Thursdays at 12 noon, starting on October 2.
As always, we appreciate your support as we go through these changes. Leo and I continuously strive to make TWiT the best it can be and we couldn’t do it without you.
In a possibly related move, it appears that Sarah Lane’s Wikipedia entry has been deleted.
