Leo Laporte shows his bare cock to the TWiT editors; his pixelated dick to viewers

Even as the vast TWiT viewership was spared the unspeakable horror of witnessing Leo Laporte’s naked cock bobbing in the serene but toxic waters of his Japanese soaking tub, the poor editors at the TWiT Shithouse had to pixelate out his bare member before posted to the public. Which means, of course, that they had to see him naked. And that should constitute sexual harassment in anyone’s book—even by prolific TotalDrama commenter Molly’s standards.

Even the crass Father Robert “Dronefucker” Ballecer cringed after the short segment on “Before You Buy.” How could this video by Leo even be remotely viewed as family-friendly? Leo’s clear intention was to titillate the viewer with the censored version. He literally “got off” on imaging his viewers being forced to think what was under the pixelation. So how is this man even allowed to claim his network is “safe for children?”

Celebrated TotalDrama writer RichardYa says, “This behavior is outrageous and should not be permitted on the network, this is how the #guzzler sees the audience in one video, this is not funny and there is no place for this on TWiT.”

TotalDrama calls upon TWiT’s viewers to boycott the network until Leo publicly apologizes to the parents and children for what he has done.

TotalDrama is also looking into the legal ramifications of Leo using his property to videotape commercial segments for his network, which might violate Petaluma housing codes neighborhood homeowner association rules.

And just in case the official TWiT video is re-edited and uploaded again, here are the screensnap of Leo’s pixelated cock:

leo-tub
NOT family-friendly in the least.

Christina Warren sprays bullshit out of her mouth

Christina Warren makes no sense whenever she opens her mouth.
Christina Warren makes no sense whenever she opens her mouth.

Whenever Mashable’s Christina Warren appears on “Tech News Today” she pretty much just sprays bullshit out of her mouth. There’s really no other way to describe the amount of shit she expects the viewers to believe. She is a dumb woman with zero credibility. Just because she talks fast, doesn’t mean she’s making any sense.

Megan Morrone: Christina, do you like Linux?
Christina Warren: I do. I use my Mac laptop everyday, but I certainly use Linux on the server.

Um, OK. That’s great, Christina. Thanks for the detailed account of your experience with Linux.

At least she wasn’t wearing a stupid hat.

A call for TWiT to address equal pay for women in tech

There’s been a lot of discussion here around the round table at the editorial board at TotalDrama about the alleged recent bombshell TWiT salaries leak. Should we publish the data? Should we expose the real leak inside TWiT? Is this even real? Would the retaliation against Jason C. Cleanthes (EffenDunn) be so devastating personally that he’d be in danger of losing his job and having to resort to this or heaven forbid, this.

TotalDrama has decided that we are not comfortable with any of those scenarios. (And it’s possible somebody impersonated EffenDunn.) Moreover, the exact salary figures aren’t really important. What is important is that TWiT’s female staffers are allegedly getting a raw deal. They might possibly be working more hours for less pay than their male counterparts. So out of respect to the women at TWiT, we are not going to release the salaries—we believe it would foment too much ill will among current staffers.

But the fact remains that an alleged massive imbalance in pay between male and female staffers must be addressed publicly by Leo and Lisa if there is any hope of living up to the worthy ideal of equal pay for women in tech.

So we call upon Leo and Lisa to address this issue head on. Without their strong voice setting the record straight, their viewers and our readers have no choice but to assume the worst.

Dogs? We looooove doggies


SuperDog by totaldramatist

Now there have been complaints that TotalDrama has ceased to produce original content, that we are content to post dog videos and scarves walking around…

Where are the wonderful videos of Leo and Lisa? Why can’t anyone spend hours and hours looking through saved videos for those magic moments that will make everyone laugh?

Because nobody has the time. No one cares that much. Leo doesn’t care; neither do we.

Personally I don’t want to make TWiT look better than it is. I don’t want to take a Mike Elgan random walk and make it look interesting. Let the crap fall where it may and stay there.

I found a dog jumping after a ball video. Here it is. Yell at me.

Wearing a hat with headphones not gaining traction as fashion trend

We're not going to stop reporting on this bullshit hat trend until it STOPS.
We’re not going to stop reporting on this bullshit hat trend until it STOPS.

Wacky blowhard Peter Friedman (apparently the “CEO” of something he alleges is called LiveWorld) appeared recently on Tonya Hall’s freaky “Marketing Mavericks” show to show off his stupid hat. What’s up with these old dudes wearing hats indoors? Plus the massive headphones with side microphone is such a natural look with a hat.

I bet Christina Warren is envious. Tweet this douche and let him know what you think of his shitty hat.

Here’s his best quote from the show, “We train our people in the voice of the brand.” Are you ready to puke yet?

Possible salary and viewer numbers leaked to TotalDrama

UPDATE: We are now calling for action from TWiT.

We can't get enough of the shit on TWiT.The TotalDrama editorial board has been sent (via an anonymous source at TWiT) both employee compensation and show viewership numbers. We’ve been burned before, so we want to ask our loyal readers whether this information can possibly be trusted.

Our former inside source was fired, and this comes from one of TWiT’s newest hires. We’re not sure if it’s the real Jason C. Cleanthes (EffenDunn) or if we’re being taken for a ride. What do you think, readers? Should we publish this information that apparently has come from EffenDunn?’

We’re asking because the difference in pay between the male and female employees is extreme. The women at TWiT would be very upset if these numbers became public; after all, we are not monsters.

It’s that time of year again to vote against TWiT

Vote your little hearts out, haters!
Vote your little hearts out, haters!

It’s that time of year again to cast your vote not only FOR other podcasts, but at the same time AGAINST any TWiT show in the 10th Annual Podcast Awards. All you have to do is promise not to vote for “This Week in Tech” and we all win!

It’s never been this easy to participate in the downfall of a shitty company.

Official Recommendations (from the comments)

Peoples Choice Serial
Best Video Podcast Night Attack (Banned by TWiT)
Comedy WTF w Marc Maron
Gaming The Instance (Unwanted by TWiT)
General Serial
Podsafe Music Coverville (Ignored by TWiT)
Politics No Agenda (Adam hates Leo and JCD)
Technology DTNS (Obvious)

Two nutcases talk about their stupid business

These two buffoons claim to run TWiT.
These two buffoons claim to run TWiT.

This evening, two escapees from the Petaluma Insane Asylum were spotted on-camera talking about their dumb business on a show they repeatedly referred to as “Inside TWiT.”

Leo Laporte and his giggly bride, Lisa Laporte, went on for about 20 minutes just babbling about “schedules changes” and various sex-related shit involving a “Japanese soaking tub” and other assorted garbage. None of this could be confirmed by the editorial board at TotalDrama, so we’ll just have to wait for our team of experts in London and Dubai to edit it together. Until then, we can’t even begin to make any sense of what was broadcast.

At this point, it’s all just a blur of crude corporate half-truths and crazy talk.

Video to come…story developing…