Did we ever post this video?

Can you guys leave a comment if you’ve seen this or not on the blog? The first part is where Alex Lindsay’s Question Engine gets trolled into oblivion.

But I can’t remember if it’s been posted, but it’d be such a shame if it hasn’t been seen. The later part contains the now-classic “Starbucks is not a technology” bullshit that Gumbot tried to foist on us months ago.

Leo will never change

Leo Laporte proves on video for about the jillionth time that he’s nothing but a sexist pig. Pointing at a female guest’s crotch like it was a blueberry pie and cackling like the sex-obsessed perv that he is, Laporte escapes only by seconds before his unsuspecting guest realizes what an ogling ogre he is.

Mike Elgum is not funny

Mike Elgum attempts one of the oldest forms of ribald humor, the limerick, and fails miserably because he lacks the balls to carry it through. Oh, if only the great and powerful Leo Laporte had been on set to finish what Elgum started, we’d have a much stronger video to share with you. But what we’re left with is a milquetoast dummy with no backbone and there’s nothing funny about that.

THIS WEEK IN TECH: NOW SINKING!

Women used to appear on TWiT
Women used to appear on TWiT (See the long hair)

The fallout from the Apocolypse of 2014 is still being felt today, eleven months later. The positive network effect (of the former TNT, and other shows) was overlooked by TWiT’s founder and CEO. Losing those programs and people is now having the opposite network effect on the failing network and this loss is too big for even Doubting Saint Thomas to deny. Thanks to the hard work of Tom, Sarah, Jason and Iyaz, the admittedly expensive show TNT finally broke even in the 2013 ledger, even under TWiT’s skewed accounting practices. This feat was a huge boon to TWiT finances. TNT was a daily show that anchored the live views. A whole host of internet stars were brought in by Merritt, unheralded ancillary shows were popular, much of the  audience from CNET came over, shows from The Social Hour to Framerate brought in audiences and a percentage of all those show’s audiences became TWiT viewers. All this at no cost to TWiT as the TNT show broke even.
It must be said, this was a commendable plan to grow the network. A plan developed in a day gone by. A plan that worked as they grew without fail, year after year.

         Sample Invoice
Fake Invoice – *NOT REAL*

But that was not enough for the new TWiT, they wanted all that money. As everyone who was not asleep under a rock knows, in the interest of saving a few bucks, the hallmark news program was torpedoed to save a few thousand dollars a year. The loss of the bulwark show had immediate repercussions.  Friends of TWiT were friends no more, chatroom members were banned for speaking out, other shows were cancelled, TWiT birthed its own competition and no new shows were working. Today, no one at TWiT seems able to right the ship as they neglected to employ anyone with a management background. Money is being thrown at scammers who use phrases like “increasing brand image to vertically integrate programming.”
My friends, the emperor has no clothes.

More money coming his way
More money coming his way

Now the falling dominoes have reached the previously untouchable, This Week in Tech. The show that seemed invincible, is not what it once was. Week after week, more and more people unsubscribe. Firing Chad seemed like a stretch as Leo blamed anyone and everyone (including TD.N) but himself. Jason has been thrust into the glaring spotlight and we hope he is not next to fall on his sword.  Fabled tech hero, John C. Dvorak has been begged and wooed to appear more often on the flagship show and other less noteworthy voices have been offered money to be on the program, but nothing is working. Desperation is settling in. The show with the most ads and highest downloads is falling and falling fast.  We all know that TWiT was keeping the network afloat. Can they survive without its success? How long until someone comes up with a competing show that deals the death blow? Maybe Kevin Rose or Dvorak himself will do it. They will have to sell a lot of shirts to make up the lost revenue, maybe V-necks will help, I like V-necks.

*Update* The invoice is not real, it was meant to illustrate how podcasts are billed. Twit does not have the final numbers on DL’s until two or three weeks after taping. Totaldrama has estimated CPM rates, not actual.

Gina Trapani is a dumb, stuttering fraud

Gina Trapani is a host on “This Week in Google.” Gina Trapani is dumb. She has nothing to add and stutters her way through half-formed opinions and vacillating indecisiveness. Gina Trapani should not be supporting the sexist Leo Laporte by appearing on his program, but that is a topic for another day.

Leo Laporte warns OMGChad not to get fat

In a stunning lack of self-awareness, the bloated and pompous Prick of Podcasting, Leo Laporte, warns his former employee Chad Johnson about getting fat. Just days before, Leo ’n’ Lisa had fired Chad after years of loyal service. So it’s particularly sad to see Chad have to laugh off Leo’s rude comments after Chad’s humiliation. Best of luck to you, Chad! We hope the only thing that ever gets fat on you is your wallet.

Exposing The Dark Underbelly of TWiT, Leo Laporte, and Failed CEO Lisa Laporte