Tag Archives: Heaven

A reminder to the religious fanatics

A reminder to the religious fanatics attacking this blog: Leo Laporte is an atheist and thinks you’re all stupid for your beliefs.

Go tell the non-believer to start believing—this blog doesn't want to hear it.
Go tell the non-believer to start believing—this blog doesn’t want to hear it.

Oh, and make sure you’re in church on Sunday. “God” is watching and sees everything you do.

Seriously–get your ass to church and stop obsessing on this blog. Oh, and while you’re in church, go ahead and pray for Padre’s soul as well. He’s going to hell for not lifting a finger off his drone controls even once to help the poor.

He who weeps for these, weeps for corruption

Today, Leo Laporte saw an opportunity to cash in on a ratings windfall. After initially deriding the popular ALS “Ice Bucket Challenge” as silly, the Corpulent Campbell’s Soup Crooner turned the challenge into a last-ditch effort to save the struggling TWiT Network. But what happened directly after Laporte’s desperate action is what caught our attention here at #TotalDrama.

The Hefty Hypocrite’s stunt left puddles all over the multi-million dollar studio and expensive equipment. (Equipment, it should be noted, that was paid for in part by TWiT fans.) See the video above as the panicked and brainwashed TWiT slaves spring into action as Laporte is seen at first laughing, then averting his uncaring gaze from the embarrassing scene. Watch as Laporte’s staff labors on their hands and knees, their over-worked fingers scraping the studio floor—groveling before their Lord and Master. The minions try desperately to clean up his mess with nothing but dirty rags. Turns out, that this shameful exhibition could have been avoided had the Obese Orator only bothered to lay down a waterproof tarp or simply go outside like every other sane participant of the challenge did. “Let the minions do their duty,” one might well imagine Laporte muttering as he left the set.

*Update* A viewer claims that Laporte’s pampered pooch, Ozzie, was seen to have followed the glutton off set as Laporte continued to cackle at his dejected indentured servants.