Leo enjoys pornography.Porn aficionado Leo Laporte let us know one of his favorite porn sites during iOS today: JamesDeen.com (NSFW). We knew he was a big fan of watching porn in virtual reality as well as on the previously linked Samsung Galaxy smartphone.
However, it must be pointed out that Leo regularly hands his iPad over to jammerb to clean with that screen cleaner solution of which Soup is so fond. We shudder to think of the biological material John has come in contact with, thanks to the Chief TWiT.
He nasty.
We were tipped off to this story by a wonderful reader/chatter. Thanks to everyone that sends in tips and participates in our chat. There’s no way we can stand to watch TWiT all the time, so we rely on reader tips/suggestions.
While waiting to talk to his good friend, Danny Boyle, Leo Laporte ruminated on his probable new location for the TWiT studio. This is the studio that FMCP alluded to 6 weeks ago, and the one confirmed by CeHO less than a week ago.
1370 Redwood Way, Petaluma, CAAn enterprising fellow in #twitlive sleuthed around and got Soup to admit that his new location (1370 Redwood Way) is located in an old office park — with ample on-site parking — far away from his current upscale downtown location right across from his beloved soup market.
Live from the TWiT beige metal house far, far away from beautiful downtown Petaluma, it’s The New Screen Savers!
The rent is too damn high.
We feel sorry for jammerb. He will soon have to travel quite a distance to fetch food for Leo on command. Our sources indicate this will not affect Lisa’s trips to the massage parlor and lack of time in the office.
In a superhuman feat of sleuthing by members of the Total Drama editorial board—who for the time being must remain anonymous (think about the midnight raid on Bin Laden)—we are now prepared to announce that TWiT is making plans as we speak to move out of the Shithouse at 140 Keller St. to an as-yet unknown space. But one thing is for sure: TWiT will not be broadcasting from the “million dollar studio” for much longer. Perhaps this is why Leo has already shut down plans for the traditional New Year’s Eve show.
Hilton A. Goring could not be reached for comment.
Our story about PadreSJ talking in an unscripted moment about moving to a mysterious “Studio C”—that many speculated was disinformation or reverse-trolling by the Fat Mexican Clown Priest—may indeed be about to happen. In the above video, Lisa Kentzell Laporte kisses Leo’s head as he signs away his life yet again and gives away “critical information” about his current lease in what’s known as an estoppel certificate.
Only time will tell how much of a débâcle this new studio will be. Stay tuned to Total Drama for more on this developing story and please use the comments section if you’d like to throw in your guess as to where Leo and his untalented gang of hacks will be headed next.
One might wonder why he has poured a million dollars — if you believe him — into the TWiT studio he is leasing. But then again, he’s a Yale dropout, so he probably knows better than we do.
Here’s what the obese piece of shit had to say to his sycophants in #twitlive:
<~Leo> our rent is about $13K now - it will go to $20k or more
<~Leo> we don't really want to spend that much
<~Leo> it's overpriced for what it is
<~Leo> we can cut our rent to $5K
<~Leo> we'll build a new and more beautiful set
<~Leo> but we do get some stuff here we can't duplicate
<WaterBoy> Leo should move the studio to his home Garage
<~Leo> we actually considered that WaterBoy
<thubten2001> Sounds like you need a good to comercial agent to negotiate for all options
<~Leo> we have an excellent one thubten2001
Update: Many commenters have raised concerns about our search criteria. There are no matches for any Laporte with the first name starting with L (this would include Lisa and Leo), without even considering an email address. His son, Henry, does have an account under his school email, but has not supported any Patreon campaigns.
Leo is very public with his accounts, and the reason none can be found under his name or very well-known emails is because he never created a fucking account because he wouldn’t stoop to paying for something he can get for free. He just complained on The Tech Guy about Textual 5 (his IRC program) being a $5 upgrade. For someone who spends money so freely, he is the most stingy person we know.
This information is accurate as of September 10, 2015, the latest date in the Patreon dump.
Leo Laporte lies all the time. We’ve posted examples of his many lies on a regular basis, but there’s one we couldn’t prove until recently. Every time OMGchad has been on, or Leo talks to Dickie D, he claims to looooooooooooooooove Patreon and implies that he donates to projects on the platform.
#Soup even had Jack Conte, founder of Patreon, on Triangulation and had his band, Pomplamoose, on The New Screen Savers recently to play. Each time, he hypes up Patreon. This video is a great example:
We finally have proof of what we always knew to be true: Leo Laporte has never given a single fucking cent to any project on Patreon. The fat fuck doesn’t even have an account.
Not a single cent!
We now know this thanks to hackers who used an obvious flaw in Patreon’s platform to exfiltrate all of their data and source code. The TotalDrama editorial board has been poring over the data, looking for any sign we might be wrong, but we were not. Leo has no account.
mysql> SELECT * FROM tblUsers
-> WHERE Email LIKE '%@leoville.%'
-> OR Email LIKE '%@twit.tv'
-> OR Email = 'laporte@gmail.com'
-> OR Email = 'leolaporte@outlook.com'
-> OR (LName = 'Laporte'
-> AND FName LIKE 'L%');
Empty set (6.60 sec)
Leo Laporte didn’t appreciate being called a liar in the the chat room, but the gestapo mods quickly muted the brave chatter who dared point out that he lied. Thanks to that person for the inspiration for this post.
Exposing The Dark Underbelly of TWiT, Leo Laporte, and Failed CEO Lisa Laporte
