Category Archives: Opinion

We Love Our Devs

Nobody appreciates the third party developers, who make the various twit apps for the fans, more than Leo. No one. Every chance he gets to thank Craig he does. They do such a great job, but the future is mobile and that will be some decent money. In our exclusive view of the new website we noticed an Apps page on the prestigious navigation bar. (Just follow the subtle red arrow below)

Follow the Red Arrow
Follow the Red Arrow

Debuting alongside this new site will be the official TWiT owned IOS, Android and Windows apps. Figure they push their new app hard and get 100,000 combined IOS/Android downloads at $3.99 and wallah, the new website is paid for plus a small profit. Stick in some ads on the apps and you have more money coming in. All they needed to do was screw over a few friendly developers. Maintenance? Let the current engineers do it. They walk around a lot anyway.

TWiT Employee Hilton Goring could not be reached for comment
TWiT Employee Hilton could not be reached for comment

Get ready for the hard sell folks. $$$
Man if I am right about this, it really is all about money. Remember when they cared about content. A full review of the site is on savingtwit.org. I don’t understand how Hilton still works there. He needs to move on already.

Was the android experiment a failure?

I will preface this ground breaking article by proclaiming myself both an Apple-fan and a Google-hater. I do like some Google stuff like YouTube and Google-fiber, but let’s save why I dislike Google for another time.  This preamble would not be complete without my declaration that I have never even owned an Android product. However I am willing to stipulate for the record that Android is as functional, useful, utilityish and versatile as Apple’s IOS and possibly more so in many cases. (Albeit quite ugly)

Dumb and not cute
Dumb and not cute

Android has been a phenomenal success. The sales are incredible and they have become #1 while hurdling the obstacle of being second-to-the-party. Android adoption continues to grow and everyone agrees it generally gets better and better. This doesn’t sound like a failure.

Dream big!
Dream big!

The Android experiment was not built just to be a competing operating system to IOS. It was novel, an open platform to be built upon and improved upon by major manufacturers and anyone with a good ideas. That was the experiment, can we build a better OS by making it open to the world. On a basic level, the failure becomes clear when we look at how everyone prefers pure android and not the garbage affixed to it by Samsungesque manufacturers. But the disappointment is greater than that. The same independent (non-Apple) developers who made the iPhone a significantly better device by adding their ingenuity via applications were now supposed to take Android to the next level. Many of us had hoped for more than phones, we wanted the OS to infiltrate technology. Here, It’s free, now go make something great!

We got shit from 3rd party people, nada, zilch, zero. Android is a full OS, it could be stripped down and combined with a crap screen and pottered into a fridge, or you can add to the OS and attach it to a robot. Android was a major ingredient for many new technologies and no one cared.

3rd world like China
3rd world like China

I want some kid in a third world country on a castaway 2009 MacBook and Android to build the next big thing. We got enough from the Amazon, Google and Apple think factories. Instead I see IOS getting more like Android and Android getting more like IOS. Are all the great minds wasting time thinking up new addictive games for my phone.  Enough with the apps engineers.

The Real Official Review

Former producer and former guest
Former producer and former guest

If you read any review and see the following phrase in the review be wary – the reviewer is a “fanboy” and unqualified to do a review.

“It feels good in the hand”

Thinks about it, why would anyone say that?

In related news, on my way home from work someone harassed me  on the train by bumping into me, then the guy at the deli harassed me by calling me “chief” and then a Starbucks barusta kept a penny of my change. Hello , any lawyers out there.

“A star takes time out for the little people”

Is the DiamondClub.TV Revamp Enough?

Looking good
Looking good

How many times have we at totaldrama been asked to recommend podcasts? Millions if not billions.

In the land of Silicon Valley, if you want to make something new you have to tell your investors that something old is broken. Payments are broken, banks are broken,  and on and on. It’s an annoying habit.

Therefore, I hate to phrase this in said manner but podcasting is broken.

Is there anything more cumbersome than being a podcast fan and bookmarking 30 websites and 30 separate calendars and keeping track of what you have watched and when stuff is on.

Even TWiT understood that viewers need easy. Easy easy easy. All the shows in one spot and recent shows playing 24/7.

For DCTV to grow, they need to do curation.

Liam and Miley will help out!
Liam and Miley

They seem to think “live” should be old reruns of Night Attack 24/7. They need more content, but curation is a word they dislike. Why? [Speculation] Curation means being a “boss” and deciding what are the best shows to put on the schedule and maybe needing to do cancellations.

Cowboys don't have to be on their own.
Cowboys don’t have to be on their own.

The Patreon model has cured a big problem for people looking to curate internet TV. In the past, a creator who used the advertising model, would likely not want to be on DCTV or any curated platform. Viewers watching live on a curated platform are not counted in downloads and so the creator is not paid. The creator also loses website impressions. But if the creator is on the Patreon model he just wants views anywhere he can get them. Additionally, many expert  prognosticators think ancillary revenue streams are a big part of the future of podcasts.

Foxes help too
Foxes help too

There is a ton of shows out there to scoop up. Why not have Eklunds hockey show on DCTV or Ashley’s feminist show and why not pick out two shows from GFQ and two from Frogpants or somewhere else. Air a few amateur shows in the wee hours of the morning, and have you heard of Veronica Belmont, where is she? Fill the schedule.

Yea You
Yea You

Why do all these internet people want to live on their own islands? Just make shows not websites and IRCs. Split the banner ad income. Get Veronica’s book fans checking out DCTV and maybe DTNS fans checking out GFQ, maybe simulcast a Twitch personality and end up discovering some young talent. Maybe one day Frogpants and DCTV and Geekbeat and Hak5 and GFQ and others will combine IRC’s (you can have your own rooms you babies) and websites. Make an app. Apps are pretty big these days I hear.

The Hard Sell

Time to Lead Tex!
Time to Lead Tex!

I never had an issue with advertising. It is part of the game. And “endorsements” essentially take advertising to the next level.  Respected people do these endorsements, top actors, athletes and podcasters. The rationale is that we (the audience) all know the game. We know they are paid and we take ads with a grain of salt. We also expect reputable people to only advertise products they think have value. Even a product like Pepsi that is the exact same thing as Coke has value and is not worse than Coke. If you endorse a brand that is fair too, brands have a right to flaunt their feathers.

So why do some endorsements make me vomit? Is it because I don’t like the person? Or is it something else? After much deliberation, discussion, introspection and analysis I came to a satisfying answer.

Is Pineda an Ace?
Is Pineda an Ace?

If you watch someone like Howard Stern or the lovely and talented Sarah Lane pitch  a product, you see that they are doing their job. They read the copy, and if it is a silly product they have fun with it. Whereas when others do ads, they lie and lie and oversell. You think this is my imagination and my bias but it is not. I assure ya.

It is very subtle but there is a Grand Canyon of difference between endorsing a product and outright lying. The lovely and talented Sarah Lane will say, Square Space is great, it’s the best, you will love it etc. In advertising jargon this is called “puffing” and is legal. Whereas Leo will say I love it, I use it and insert a fictitious story. The pronoun “I” is key. Preying on our trust.

Pop Quiz -One of the following two statements is a lie:

  • Totaldrama is the #1 site in the world
  • Totaldrama gets over 700,000 hits  a day

Casper Mattresses: A mattress was delivered to his home, he made a video in a foyer then threw it away.
Citrix & Hipchat: Two competing services but he uses both?
Personal Capital: He won’t take the few minutes to put in his information, his account has two #s in it.
Smart Things: This product is total shit.
Bark Box: Possibly the biggest waste of money ever invented. Dogs like sticks, rags and meat.
Jack Erwin: He only wears them on days when doing the ad and he gets them free. They must suck.
Zip Recruiter: They have hired zero employees via Zip Recruiter.

Do your fans a favor, advertise, we get it, but stop lying. And don’t force yourself to use it just so you can say you use it. I don’t mind if you praise any of the products, it’s the lying I can not stomach.

Also, people work hard building their names and brands and they earn the right to sell their names. This man uses Amber McArthur’s name every time he pitches Freshbooks and Kevin Rose’s name every time he pitches Legalzoom, is that right? Pay them!

You go too far.

When I google the registered agent, I don't get Legal zoom.
When I Google the registered agent phone number I didn’t get Legalzoom, did you? Was 2007 ten years ago? Time flies.

Robert Downey Jr

Ask Jeeves not Jarvis
Ask Jeeves not Jarvis

There are many people who are oh so very happy that a real actor like Robert was brought in to play Ironman. However, much like Johny Bravo, it was just the suit. In truth, Robert is a very below average actor. If you look at his resume you will see that he plays the same character in every film, the ‘arrogant highly intelligent man.’ It gets worse. The way he plays intelligence is by talking fast, he thinks that is what intelligent people do. He must be a moron, *baseball player dumb. He does have comedic timing but that is his only redeeming trait and it can’t camouflage his awful acting.

His filmography peak was Chaplin, his award worthy role. Wrong. Every 15 years a movie comes along that no one will watch yet everyone says is amazing and it wins the academy award. The latest installment of this pattern was Lincoln. No one even saw that entire movie unless they were conned into seeing it in the theater, it sucked. Admit it.

1233546-khaleesiThe other masquerade is Emilia Clarke. Her career is young so I am judging her on her role as Danery’s Targaryen the Stormborn, Mother of Dragons, Breaker of Chains and Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea. She can not act, she can’t even move. I will not pass final judgement on her because whoever gave her the 12 pound wig to wear is at least equally culpable. It’s possible the reason the character is so stoic is because she can barely move while simultaneously balancing that thing on her head. Below I have put forth some other styles she might try in season 6, as worn by the lovely and talented Sarah Lane:

Bangs, Shoulder Length or a lighter cut.
Bangs, Shoulder Length or a lengthy lighter cut.

 *Many people think football players are the dumbest athletes but it is baseball players.