A prayer for Padre

Father Robert Ballecer, the slow-moving dullard host of 46 different TWiT shows, has posted on Twitter that Sept. 16 is a day of decision for him.

So it with a hopeful heart that we offer up this prayer to the Most Almighty of All, Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of Kings and Bringer of Peace and Hope to the World:

Dearest God in Heaven Above,

Please take our Padre away from us—as you need him more than us.
Let his service at The Vatican bring joy to others far away from us.
The more you make him work for others in a land nowhere near the United States of America, the more good he can do.
Please understand that our joy comes not from Padre not being with us, but from the everlasting light that he brings to others and just keep him away from us forever more.

We ask this in your name, Lord Jesus. Bless Padre and let his flight take him to the farthest reaches of the globe, never to return.

Amen

5 thoughts on “A prayer for Padre”

  1. Is the Friar freaking playing his usual games? This seems to be a regular thing with him. to allude to ‘new choice’ dilemma every couple of months and yet he remains doing what he is doing.

    I did hear that they wanted him in the Vatican, they needed a food taster.

    (apologies to anyone offended by this comment, it is meant in the most sincere fashion)

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  2. Another thought.

    Perhaps padre is being called up by the church to be dropped kicked out of the Jesuit brotherhood. If all goes well this is not the case, as we with then be inflicted with more of his blubbery misguided presence. But if we had to speculate, one possible reason could be that he is dragging the ecclesial community into disrepute by his disgusting unholy onscreen antics. Another could be that he is consuming the church out of “house and home” with his gluttonous dietary needs. Who knows. Let us all hold hands and pray even harder that the Church will forgive his slothful unspiritual way and help him find some pride in a far away monastery where he is away from dogs, children, and the enlightened tech community. Amen.

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