Being an ace reporter for #TotalDrama means I am responsible to answer my critics. Unlike Gum and #soupguzler who deafen their ears to criticism, I will not not only hear mine but I will act on it.
Apparently I have been accused of a bias, a word I despise. There are those who think I show preferential treatment to the lovely and talented Sarah Lane, that I am incapable of turning the high powered microscope of analysis on her. This article should quell that disruption for awhile as I explain why Sarah should not have accepted the $75. That is right folks, here I go. #deepbreath
The year was 2011 and head chat mod/head sleaze visited his idol in Petaluma California. He brought some other mods with him. They seem to travel in packs, a gaggle, a flock, a school, a pride, I am unaware of the technical term. As part of the slave-masters training he treated the slaves, who serve him free-of-charge for thousands of hours, to a steak dinner. [A practice used in training dogs which was outlawed in 1988 by the ASPCA incorporates oscillating between treat and punishment. Yet this banned practice is still used by Laporte] The mods had one request, bring Sarah.
It was a night Sarah had no plans but as you can imagine, many an excuse was concocted to avoid this. The obvious strategy of drinking herself into a stupor was unavailable because she needed to drive herself home. This meant she would have to sit there sober with the mods and Laporte. Finally, #soup offered her $75 and a free dinner and she took it. She sat there listening to that boy-child telling tales of being head mod. “I barely listen to TWiT anymore, I am so busy.” “I just check in the chat once in a while and kick some people.” “Those guys cry about getting kicked, get a life.” On and on he went about how above IRC he was. uuuugggghhh Sarah unexpectedly left early.
Should Sarah have taken the $75? After all, these freaks of nature in some way serve her too. They kick anyone who is remotely complimentary towards her appearance or half as creepy as the mods themselves. I condemn her for taking this money. It was a night-out for the mods. They put pants on and got dressed up and she should have done it free.
Ok, no favoritism here.
I hate you all for what you made me do.
