With a hot tip from a loyal TotalDrama chatroom participant, the editorial board here at TotalDrama would like to present Leo ‘n’ Lisa with a customized list of places they can have public sex now that they are no longer living in sin after their fairy-tale wedding in Northern California last week:
The Port Authority Bus Terminal at 42nd and 8th Ave. offers public toilets so they can not only bang with a group of bums watching, they can clean up afterwards.
Restaurant Row (46th St. btw 8th and 9th Aves.) offers places ranging from sushi to Italian steaks. Leo could tip the maitre-d $50 so they could fuck right on one of the private tables in the corner.
Bouchon Bakery at the Time Warner Center offers macarons and fine pastries that Leo can shove up Lisa’s ass before screwing her on the escalator leading down to the Whole Foods.
Lincoln Center at 66th and Broadway has a beautiful fountain that has recently undergone a multi-million dollar renovation. Think wet t-shirt contest but with Lisa’s camel toe on full display.
Central Park Zoo (no explanation necessary).
The Meatpacking District at 14th and 9th Ave. (no explanation necessary).
John F. Kennedy International Airport is a great place for Leo to bury his ham hock into Lisa’s porkpie before boarding the redeye back to California.
The Brooklyn Navy Yard can play host to over 1,000 sailors waiting in line to tittyfuck Lisa’s saggy ladyparts.