Google to Sell Milk

Search Milk?
Search Milk?

On the heels of their foray into the wireless service industry, Google Inc announced it will be entering the dairy game. Google will be buying milk farms across Montana and selling Google branded Milk. Google cows will only be fed natural grass. The milk will be available for  purchase by December 2015 in a beta program.

The milk will be sold at a cost equal to 85% of the price of other milk brands. Google will not be making any profit on the milk. In order to be eligible to buy the milk you must have Google set as your default search engine and use an android phone.

Asked for comment the professor said, “This is great, Google cares about people drinking milk. Google is not exercising monopoly power”
Asked for comment the Gum said, “It is a free country and people will benefit by cheaper milk. Google is not exercising monopoly power”

Daity Queen, Maines Own and 365 Milk have all announced plans to file for chapter 11 bankruptcy.

10 thoughts on “Google to Sell Milk”

  1. I get it. You’re being sarcastic. But even then it wouldn’t be a monopoly unless Google controlled 85% of the total US available milk. I agree with Gum on that Google is not forcing anybody to use their shit. It’s a free country (EU I’m looking at you) and you’re free to use bing, Yahoo, duckduck, blekko, webcrawler, and a shitload of other search engines. Heck, Europe should star using Yandex and see the big middle finger coming out of Russia faster than they can say “monopoly!” lol I’m kidding, don’t use Yandex.

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    1. Google is the best search engine and they earned whatever share of the market they can get. 90% 95% or 100% they earned it all. What they can not do is enter other markets (outside search) and take them over by being a bully. If they want to dominate Milk or the Wireless industry they need to be the best.

      It is not fair if they operate in other markets for no profit because they are filthy rich from being the best at search. Then they further the bullying by making it so that if customers want the other industry’s cheap (milk or wireless) product/service they need to keep using Google search. This is a monopoly practice. It makes it impossible to compete for reasons outside being the best. If you have a company producing the best milk no one cares because they can get cheaper milk that is subsidized by a search engine. Very similar to Microsoft earning dominance in O/S on computers but trying to use that dominance to take over browsers (browser was a distinct market) with IE.

      It is a good bet to play the odds and never agree with Gûm.

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      1. Google is a great service. They actually saved my ass a few times. I veered off course in the pouring rain last year and Google maps with it’s clear and easy user interface got me back on course. Thank you Google for helping me find my way.

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      2. I get why Google is putting it’s own services on top of the search results. It’s fair. running those unbelievable expensive servers ain’t cheap. They’re running a business after all. Google also lets advertisers put their add at top of the page, for a fee. The EU it’s actually bullying their way because they can’t come up with a Google rival by competing fairly. So they want their companies on top of Google pages. Well ain’t that a great plan. Make Coca Cola put a little add of Dr Pepper on top of the cans, because it ain’t fair CocaCola is the monopoly.
        But I actually use Yahoo. Best Bing search engine.

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