In a stunning turn of events, TotalDrama has been forced to issue a public apology and would like to make the following corrections to the record:
- Leo Laporte is not fat and has never sexually harassed anyone at anytime.
- Lisa Kentzell is an excellent CEO and has pretty hair.
- “Marketing Mavericks” is a great show.
- Jeff Jarvis has beautiful teeth.
- NatureBox does not taste like cardboard.
- Mike Elgan is a capable broadcaster and never stutters.
- There are African-Americans on the network every day and just because we can’t see them, doesn’t mean they are not there.
- Christina Warren looks professional in her drugged-up hippie hat.
- Jason Snell does not need a bra.